Tuesday, 02 June 2009
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Here it is June 2009 already and I look back to the day I started xanga and wonder where the time went? The seasons of my life have changed so much since I started this journey, a second divorce from my teenage sweetheart and father of my four children.... a marriage to the one who I thought would be my forever mate....banished from my church for adultery.... the death of my mother.... a daughter who cuts and her and her two children homeless....a hysterectomy....two sisters and a brother disown me for 5 long years....a daughter distances herself from me..... a skull fracture accident with my son..... a near death saga for my two year old granddaughter.... former worship leader dies suddenly....another worship partner dies from cancer....another worship comrade dies in a sudden motorcycle accident.... a cancer diagnosis for my husband.... a near death brush for my husband.....I move with my son to 6 different places, two of those are each of my grown children's basements..... more near death days for my husband....separation from my husband, again..... and again....my sickness.......more sickness.....disability for me since my back is messed up and I have fibromyalgia..... best friend dies from a rare disease.....grief.....counseling....more counseling.....abuse..... an angry,bi polar husband who refuses help..... a fallen pastor.....another divorce that I did not want....a broken and bleeding heart....grief....former pastor who banished me from church for adultery falls into adultery, goes through divorce and marries his secretary....grief....maybe there is more but it is enough..........whoever said the Christian life is no more suffering? Scripture tells us that there are many afflictions for the righteous and some of this was my own "afflicting"....like David...I strayed...NOW I WILL TESTIFY.....Jesus is FAITHFUL and I am not....but here is His grace and mercy....my granddaughter was healed.....my son was healed....the sun still rises and satan has not won....I walk with a limp....
my heart is healing...I walk with a limp....my soul is healing.....I walk with a limp....my body is healing...I walk with a limp...I have an apartment for my son and I....I walk with a limp....my sisters and brother now speak to me again....my mother lives on in heaven and in me...I walk with a limp....I forgive me ex husbands daily...I walk with a limp....my daughter was delivered and bought her own home....I have 9 wonderful grandchildren....I eat heathy and feel much better....my former church restored me to themselves and I had healthy closure with the church.....my other former pastor went to jail and was broken which is restoring him to God....I walk with a limp....I have a new grandbaby coming.....I am learning to lean....I walk with a limp....I am ministering to hurting women...I walk with a limp....I am writing and making money at it, hopeful to get off disability....I have HOPE....after losing ALL hope....I walk with a limp....Jesus came to me in the night while I wept....I am NOT alone....I walk with a limp.... I can sing again....HE WALKS WITH ME....with my limp and HIS scars.....Bless His Holy Name...... I went up to the mountain.....because He asked me to......http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gl4HjwQ77XM.
God Bless all my xanga friends......
http://www.ehow.com/members/jseven.html?view=3rd
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Comments (9)
Oh my goodness! That was so beautiful...painful, but beautiful! Thank you for your testimony! And I'm so glad you stopped by my site to say hello. I'm just speechless.
May God continue to bless you and heal you and your family. After all you have gone through, the blessing must be extra sweet.
Love and Hugs
Karen
PS: I almost forgot...I wanted to tell you...I'm going to be a grandma for the first time in November! We are very excited, but our daughter and her husband are 7 hours away in Ohio so that part stinks. You have a jump on me in the grandma department...maybe I can catch up! LOL!
You are amazing Grace! Truly Amazing.
I struggle with the fact that life is so hard for so many good and faithful Christians!
What an extraordinary piece of writing, and the truth of it is startling - I don't know at all, how you manage to (metaphorically) put one foot in front of the other, and keep going. thank you for sharing this, I have been in a bit of a tough patch, but nothing, nothing like this. Again, thank you for writing this. Gill
I have clicked through to Ehow, what a wonderful idea....but how do you get paid when someone reads an article. I would love to do this (write), hence my question? I have clicked and read some articles, very interesting, but I didn't pay to do this...? hope you don't mind that I am asking? thanks - Gill
Tears of joy ... sorrow ... healing ... restoration flowed as I read your post. "I walk with a limp" ... Brings to memory a poem, but I can't find it right now. Do you remember that song, "Learning to Lean" ... This is a most beautiful writing as it comes from your heart. It is definitely full of HOPE. HE IS FOR US AND NOT AGAINST US! EVERYTHING WE HAVE NEED OF, WE WILL FIND IN HIM. HE IS ALL WE NEED.
Carolyn
Hi GraceFlyer.....wow...you walk with a limp, but the Glory of God is beaming out all over for all to see.....your limp is a reminder of weaknes....your walk is a constant blow to the head of the adversary....I love your heart, your attitude, your faith, your hope....you are real...we need real....we don't need flaky faith....we don't need faith that is only presumption.....we need real heros in the Kingdom of God....Keep beaming and walking with that limp.....He's using it all.....and you are advancing the Kingdom in ways you have no idea.....bless you sister....peace, comfort and continued healing upon your heart and soul!!!!
Thanks my fellow warrior sisters, you are all inspirations.....
Good morning from Southern Iowa. I have been browsing your site and finding much encouragement from your writing. I appreciate your openness. I shall subscribe to your site and welcome you to my site.